Hi! If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to our RSS feed, follow us on Instagram, Twitter, and Telegram, and subscribe to our YouTube channel. Thanks for visiting!
XII.
As Hillary wakes up on the third day, she sees the most ghastly shape imaginable standing by her feet next to the bed, a sight almost as ghastly as the one staring back at her in the mirror on a bad hair day. She’s really spooked, but the spirit wastes no time and just pulls her out of her bed for the ride.
XIII.
Hillary finds herself dragged to a modern institution she’s very fond of: Child Protective Services, or Social Services as it’s known in much of the world outside of the U.S. She breathes a sigh of relief as the duo fly into the building and what she expects to be a safe space.
“What awful sight are you going to show me here, you hideous spirit?” she rhetorically asks. “Perhaps all the good society has done for vulnerable children?”
Though she expects the spirit to answer her, it simply remains silent. It does, however, move her within hearing range of the employees there.
“Did you hear about the old bat finally croaking,” a man asks.
“That bat Hillary?”
“Indeed.”
“Couldn’t have happened a day too soon. I mean, she did get us all these nice jobs, but oh, she was so unbearable as a person!”
“I hear you there. So are you attending her funeral next Thursday?”
“Ahh, well…I think I’ve got more interesting stuff to do. Like…well, I’m sure I’ll think of something.”
“I bet none of us would be welcome anyway. I mean, the witch would have found one reason or another why we weren’t politically correct enough to attend.”
“Wouldn’t surprise me.”
XIV.
Next, she’s brought to a maternity hospital. The spirit motions her to a written guide on the newest procedures in the ways of “child welfare.” She opens it up, and finds the following wording:
Child Welfare
As per Children’s Protection Act 770, all children are to become wards of the state at birth at the maternity hospitals. Failure to report to a state-mandated maternity hospital when giving birth will render the mother a non-citizen without any legal rights, including denial of the right to ever see her offspring. As wards of the state, children will be given full citizenship and protection from their biological parents, a freedom exercised for them by the state until the day they turn 18. Traditional parenthood has hence been abolished, and children are to be moved to day nurseries as soon as they’re able to leave the hospital.
“But this isn’t that bad, is it? This looks like a professional and well-run operation,” Hillary argues.
The spirit proceeds to take her to one of these nurseries. Ahead of her, in a large room, is a quadratic arrangement of some hundred beds, ten rows and ten columns, each with a toddler inside them. Many of them are crying, but there’s no one there to tend to their needs. Being moved to another room, she comes across children in the ages of five to seven. All of them are sitting in front of computer screens, being programmed with repetitive messages. Next to them on the desks are written labels such as “ADHD,” “autism,” and similar psychiatric diagnoses, as well as lists of drugs like Ritalin, SSRIs and such. Nearly all of them appear to have at least one diagnosis and at least one drug prescribed. No names appear to have been added to the personal information.
By now, Hillary does appear to have a somewhat troubled facial expression. Have they really turned my idea of government care into this? How can that be? Surely I can’t be responsible for this!
XV.
Next, the spirit takes her out into the streets, where there are plenty of men roaming about, but no women to be seen anywhere. Well, at least no women not in uniform, because there are a good number with sleeves that say “CPS,” apparently on the lookout for pregnant women. The spirit hands her a little pamphlet that she picks up and reads:
Child Protection Procedures
Contrary to the stories of old, children do not arrive into this world by way of storks. They’re born by women who typically have a pregnancy lasting some nine months preceding this. In spite of us having abolished parenthood, some women still cling to the outdated idea that they’re going to raise these offspring themselves. They often end up trying to hide from the state, which naturally can’t be tolerated. For that reason, clearly pregnant women have to be located and identified so that we can predict when they will give birth. Furthermore, a GPS tracking device shall be installed into their bodies at this time in order to facilitate future capture. No child should ever have to be deprived of the compassion and support of the state!
Hillary is taken aback. But these mothers are treated like animals! This isn’t what I had in mind!
She turns to the spirit. “Okay, so this stuff I’ve seen here isn’t really that swell, I have to give you that. But surely people have to be appreciative of all the work I’ve done for them during their lifetime! Someone, at least!”
XVI.
Moments later, Hillary finds herself with the spirit at her beloved and lavishly furnished home. The very moment she arrives there, she finds a group of South American men with dark complexions looting the place. They go to work almost like ants, removing everything valuable they can find inside her home. Paintings get lifted off walls and a chandelier removed from the ceiling. One man digs through a drawer and retrieves a bunch of gold necklaces and other expensive jewelry.
Hillary is now in tears. “Nooo! Not my jewelry! You can’t believe how much it cost me!”
As she has another look at the men, she realizes that none of them are traditional Americans. “I fought for you guys so you could come to America! And now you’re doing this to me? Where’s the justice?!”
Understanding that she can’t do anything about this home invasion, she turns to the spirit again. “Surely you must be able to take me to at least a single person who understands my life’s work! Take me there at once!”
Yet the spirit doesn’t move an inch.
XVII.
Instead, Hillary finds herself at a tombstone. Though covered with dust at first, a gust of wind uncovers the name of the person buried there: “Aunt” Hillary. Another gust of wind reveals the epitaph underneath a few seconds later.
THIS MISERABLE WOMAN RUINED OUR SOCIETY THROUGH FEMINISM
Hillary finally breaks down, and she’s gushing with tears as she speaks. “This just isn’t right! Is this what became of my feminism, and this how people regard me after I’m dead? I want another chance to make things right! I understand now that I’ve been wrong all this time! Please give me another chance, and I’ll defend the nuclear family against all feminist attacks! I will show all the great men out there the respect they’re due, and I will preach the merits of marriage and childrearing to all women I meet. I’ve also realized that women don’t belong in the workplace, since this is the hell it leads to! I just want what’s written on this tombstone gone forever!”
***
For all installments of “A Feminism’s Carol,” click here.
Previous installments:
Daniel Hammarberg is an aspiring literary heavyweight, an IT everything-under-the-sun, a persecuted thought criminal, a former strongman competitor, and an all around swell guy. His main English-language site is DanielHammarberg.com and he lives on a formerly white island in Sweden that sadly gets ethnically darker with each passing day.