This is everything I remember. I was looking at conspiracy websites and something was different. The Internet had been hijacked and inter-dimensional portals started appearing everywhere on every website. Then I started telepathically speaking to an inter-dimensional being who was sort of messianic and Satanic, like Hesse’s novel Demian. The character Demian lured me into a dark room where he explained to me that the ultimate alchemical marriage is not between man and woman, but between Christ and Lucifer, and that it is an artist’s job to navigate this marriage and to embody it. Demian and I are inside a dark room and he is holding a large knife. The knife and the threat feel very real, and I know he is going to kill me. I start crying. I am crying intensely in my dream and I have an emotional breakdown. I don’t want Demian to kill me. He says words like “Ophiuchus” and “Arcturus” that I respond to. He identifies as an intergalactic agent from the stars and from dimensions that have been occulted from human awareness. Demian and I discuss planetary energy, time travel, dimensional energy, “rehabilitating Lucifer” and the nature of myth and reality.

Demian was manufacturing an extraterrestrial invasion. It was literally the beginning of the apocalypse. Life was ending. And yet the second attention was gaining hold. I surrendered to him and formed an alliance with him. Demian showed me artifacts from my childhood. Photos, toys, clothing and other material goods. I disowned everything. I had no connection to any of these things. Demian performed an intense mind scan on me. I was to be the subject of a ritualistic slaughter, and Demian was hesitant to spare my life, but he did. Demian allowed me to see the end of the world. Or to see the beginning of the end of something. We were actually creating realities. This was the level of genius that Demian was a part of. Demian was able to time travel to the ancient past or distant future. He chose to appear to me now in dream form. I was flying over traffic while flying saucers flew above me. It was sort of like that movie Skyline but I was unaffected by everything. A large scale disaster was imminent, and I was soaring over cars. This pleased Demian because he was able to soar as well. Then I was in a zoo that was surrounded by a lush forest. I was surrounded by every friend, every acquaintance, basically everyone I had ever known throughout my life. Everyone who had ever made an impression on me. And I was the center of attention. I said something like “Watch this!” and I started running as I leapt into the air and became a being of the air. I was literally soaring and it was my spirit that was soaring. This was when I woke up.

***

This is an excerpt from Chris Moran’s new poetry chapbook, Psyche and Specter. You can purchase the book from Terror House Press here.