Wagie Life
Wake up. It’s noon. Turn over on the mattress and look at my phone. No texts, but over 40 email messages. All are advertisements for products. I roll…
Curmudgeon 4
How to convince me that you are a bad writer or speaker: “Take” preceded by fast, quick or hot. “Convo,” “conversate,” or “commentate.” “Pricing” or…
A Prayer for Richard Power
Believe it or not, many Christians come to pray that God kill them. I want no part of that theology, so please say a different prayer for me. Pray…
Three Windows
There had been a brief introduction. The girl said she was 18 (they always were) and had traveled from West Virginia to L.A. in the hopes of becoming…
Nomocanon of Mephistopheles, Part 3
Now this new liberalism, this new blood-libel is harsher, and harder to escape than bigotry. Slavs shall never be respected---but we don’t actually…
Trigger Finger
Last night, I propped up my laptop, the laptop I am writing this on, in my bathroom sink and put on some porn. I looked at myself in the big mirror…
Nomocanon of Mephistopheles, Part 2
Therefore you do not read Gogol as a man who allowed himself to love whom he desired and hate who he hated but only as a mere satirist against…
Slot Machine Suicide
I am out in Las Vegas with my dumb cousins and things have not gone well. It is not clear to me why, but Gil, Marie, and I just fight and fight and…
Curmudgeon 3
Taxes are easy to criticize, because the rules and the rates are horrible. No person making under $100,000 adjusted for inflation should need more…
Nomocanon of Mephistopheles, Part 1
Above and below Aeropagitica, centuries lagging. To sons of Thrace, Illyria, and Dalmatia, Dacia, From Moesia, may we be eternally condemned To…
